A Letter from Lindy Oct 1
Beloved Pilgrims,
This week includes the rush to cross all of the t’s and dot all of the i’s before I step away for my last month of sabbatical. Whereas August was rest and renewal in Durham, October is a month of travel as I depart for Orlando on 10/2 to be present for both my daughter’s and granddaughter’s birthday. I return on the 15th only to hop onto a plane for Chicago that very next Friday. Yes, I am doing “work stuff” by attending a board of Trustees’ meeting, but that trip afforded me the opportunity to visit with my two Chicago brothers and their families. While I am away, my wonderful sister Tracy lived into her commitment to be present in Durham for my mom, even while the island of Maui is still deep in its grieving and recovery. Please hold her in prayer, as leaving was so very hard to do.
You will be graced with a special conversation on Sunday. A stellar panel of Pilgrims will be ably led by Richard Whitaker as they reflect on journeying with loved ones with dementia. It’s a journey I know with its own contours of grief. I pray you hold these wonderful Pilgrims in your embrace as they make themselves vulnerable with and amidst you. Let me introduce them:
Claudia Fulshaw
Claudia Fulshaw hails from NJ, has lived in Durham for the past 35 years, is self-employed as a graphic designer and as a leader of creative retreats. Her mom, Maggie, lived in Durham for 12 years, was a member of Pilgrim from 2006-2018, before moving to a Florida memory care residence when her care needs became greater. She was diagnosed with dementia when she was 85 and died on April Fool’s Day, 2022. (She would have loved that.) She was 91.
Tom Heath
Tom was born in 1951, and his sister Pat was born in 1953. Though their parents were transplanted northerners they grew up in the suburbs of Birmingham, Alabama. Tom studied law and public policy as a young man. For most of his professional career he’s worked at the University of North Carolina. Pat went to Auburn University and then the University of Virginia to become an RN, and then later a clinical nurse practitioner. She worked in nursing for her entire professional career, focusing for most of it in the area of mental health. For the last part of her career, she saw patients on her own, under the supervision of a psychiatrist.
Tom and his wife Gail have been married since 1977 and have a daughter and two granddaughters in Seattle and a son in Atlanta. Pat has lived in Birmingham her entire life. She has two children: one in Birmingham and the other in Chicago. Her first grandchild was born this summer.
Theresa Newman
Theresa Newman (married to Charlie Clotfelter) has recently retired from Duke Law School, where she worked for 31 years, the last 15 or so of which as co-founder and co-director of the School’s Wrongful Convictions Clinic. Working with law students, the Clinic represents people incarcerated in North Carolina prisons who are innocent of the crimes of which they were convicted. Theresa’s father was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s in his early 60’s, and one of her three sisters received the same diagnosis at the same age.
Richard Whitaker
Richard is a native of Savannah, GA and has been married to Martha for 46 ½ years. He has 2 children Nathan and Beth, 2 daughters-in-love Caitlin and Gia, and 2 grandchildren Frankie and Isa. He graduated from Scarritt College for Christian Workers in Nashville and did coursework at Vanderbilt Divinity School. He retired from the Wisconsin Conference, United Methodist Church in 2018, after serving 39 ½ years as Minister of Christian Education, Associate Pastor in Pastoral Care, and Interim Pastor. The Whitakers moved to Durham in anticipation of first grandchild Frankie’s arrival.
Richard was trained by WI Alzheimer’s Association as a caregiver’s support group facilitator and now facilitates our church’s caregiver’s online support group. He’s also involved with the children’s ministry and the Urban ministries team here at Pilgrim. He continues to grow into his new role as caregiver for Martha who was diagnosed with ALS last year.
shalom,
Pastor Lindy (she/her) why pronouns matter
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