A Letter from Lindy June 14
How are you feeling this week? Where are your hearts and heads amidst the swirling?
If I am being transparent, I write this note as I multitask, joined in a UCC Southern Conference webinar "America on Fire!", a second of a three part anti-racism training for UCC clergy. Making the choice to attend this conversation made me miss our Board of Christian Service meeting. So truthfully, I'm feeling wholly inadequate in negotiating through this time.
My inadequacy is not just because of how badly I seem to be juggling time management, safely-at-home, in which ever stage of pandemic we are (I've lost track). But also because my week has been filled with communal and denominational conversations about this moment--about police violence against our black and brown siblings; about white supremacy; about systemic and structural racism; about opening the church doors amidst pandemic--that have made me feel inadequate, ill-prepared to be a part of the disrupting, dismantling, leading. I keep joining to learn, to grow, to become more equipped--and every time I'm asked to speak, I end up sounding, well, not thoughtful, not learned, not wise. Truthfully, I feel like I miss the mark every time I open my mouth.
During a pastoral check-in with my friend and colleague, Deb Cayer of Eno River UU, I confessed the above. As we unpacked the various meetings in which we were both a part, she remarked, "Of course, so do I, every time I put myself out there. But what's the alternative? We can't not show up. Can't not engage. This is what we are being called to do, even if we stumble. If we don't, it all stays the same." In other words, I need to get over myself, however I sound, because I have a responsibility--a job to do. We all do.
I hope I'm not the only one who wonders where to start. I know I'm not at the Conference level because this was the very question Dr. Davis asked. Amidst denominational strategy planning, Conference ministers are turning the tables, asking for our input, so we all participate in this movement. Every UCC congregation. And I keep hearing Rev. LaShauna Austria inviting us to start with ourselves. Deep dive with and within your own people. Have the hard, sacred conversations that must be had. You will see below where Felix has named a date and time for our first attempt of so doing. I hope you will join. I know the time won't work for everyone. But I want us to try.
In Rev. Austria's presentation, she screen-shared a quote from a Washington Post writer, Dr. Evans, that should ground us about the work before us. He traced our racial challenge "directly to ineffective Christians." He stated, "One of the real tragedies today is that the Church as a whole has not furthered God's light, equality and love and principles in our land in order to be an influencer for good in the midst of darkness, fear and hate. " He called for churches to unite... to train members to be verbal and visible followers of Jesus and to unite for good works in our communities. This is our God-given responsibility for influencing the conscience of our culture.
Wow. That is hard to hear. I believe it is also true. The time has come, Rev. Austria concluded, for the church to be the church. Let's do our part, Pilgrim.
Pastor Lindy