Letter from Lindy May 1
Pilgrims,
As unremarkable as it may seem from outside, I took a huge step last weekend that I have not been able to for a few years. Well, that qualifier needs explanation.
Some of you know that I sit on the Board of Trustees for Disciple Divinity House at University of Chicago, my alma mater for which I have not joined in-person for almost three year and not virtually this past year.
Last weekend I got on a commercial jet for the first time since 2019 and flew to Chicago to be physically present. Somewhere over the years, I have gone from an avid to an anxious traveler without any concrete reason for the shift. Confessionally, this time I was scared to death, almost to the point of resigning from the board.
Having to now plan, organize, execute each step on my own, with no spousal/partner back-up felt more daunting than I could manage. At every turn, I found a glitch, an excuse to cancel. While in Florida in March, I even called the dean to discern whether it was time for me to step away from serving. As always, Kris Culp, the dean during my tenure at DDH and now, offered wise counsel. “Show up, Lindy, for this meeting and see how it feels. We can always make the decision later. But everyone wants to see you, so let’s do what we need to to make it happen. If that means missing a committee meeting, so be it. Remember, no big changes in this first year.” And so I did- show up, that is.
Not only is traveling a memory muscle I needed to exercise anew like so many, doing so now feels completely different given my new set of circumstances. I need to let go of old patterns and form new ones that work for this current iteration of my life. I realized along the way, I do not yet fully know what those patterns or rhythms might be, but if I don’t lean into trying (even with an anxious heart) I will never learn, nor prove to myself that I can take next steps—even when they are different, even when they are hard, even when I may not even want to.
I wonder if peering through this tiny looking glass of one trip might not reveal a possible truth for all of us in this season. These past two plus years have changed us. How could they not. And whether we are ready, willing or able, we need to look ahead for new ways of being and doing, even when those new ways are different, even when they are hard, even when we may not want to.
This is our journey of confession in, with and through the God we come to know in Christ Jesus. A God of movement and change and transformation, who desires always for us resurrection.
Pastor Lindy (she/her) why pronouns matter
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